The Alternative Date
Are you too busy to go on dates?
Do you struggle finding the time to meet a guy, even for a coffee?
We’re all busy and we’ve all got things we have to do and things we want to do. So how do we fit in dating, without it feeling like a chore?
We all know to find a great man we have to kiss a lot of frogs…..well certainly go on a lot of dates.
If you’ve got to the point where dating feels like a treadmill of date after date; same coffee, different face…..then I might just have the solution for you.
I call it the Alternative Date.
Why not fit your first date into your life, literally?
You’ve got a birthday present to buy for your Mum or a friend.
You want to go to the garden centre and pick up some ideas for your hanging baskets.
Why not suggest he comes along?
You’re planning a make-over of your kitchen and want to look around a posh kitchen showroom for inspiration.
You need to pick up some groceries at the local health food store.
Why not see if he wants to join you?
I’ve done all of the above with a first or second date! And they were great fun!
You know my coaching is all about leaning back and minimal effort and these types of dates are perfect for that.
I hear from a lot of women that a first date can feel like an interview. You’re sat opposite each other, batting questions backwards and forwards.
An Alternative Date is nothing like an interview, it’s a fantastic ice-breaker.
It’s strolling, it’s touching things, it’s interacting with other people….in his presence.
You will find out so much about the other person; I know I have.
Going food shopping was a particularly great date, for me. I found out a lot about his lifestyle chatting about what food we both liked, where we shopped and what we cooked for ourselves.
He made lots of suggestions on food combinations, as well as where to get good quality products. I discovered a new supermarket that I’d never visited before, which I use regularly now.
He appreciated the opportunity to push my trolley, pack my bags and carry them to the car.
AND you can still go for a coffee afterwards and you’ll both be feeling so much more relaxed by the time you sit down opposite each other.
If you like the sound of this but don’t know how to suggest an alternative date, what about this?
When he suggests a coffee and asks you if you’re free at the weekend, that’s your opportunity to say, ‘It would feel great to have a coffee with you. This weekend is really busy for me. One thing I have to do is xxxx. Would you like to join me and we can grab a coffee afterwards?’
Try it and, as always, let me know how you get on.